Today I got the results from my first algebra test in more than 32 years. When I left the classroom last Thursday, I thought it had seemed too easy. Today I learned there was a reason it seemed easy. I had no clue what I was doing. I knew when I began this back to school thing, I would have up days and down days mixed in with all the run of the mill, ordinary ones. Today I just wanted to cry. So, I did. A bit anyway.
When I woke up this morning I had a song in my head by the group American called Tin Man. The lyric in my head was "And Oz never did give nuthin' to the Tin Man, that he didn't, didn't already have." I don't know where that song came from but one thing led to another and I ended up listening to the song Defying Gravity from the musical Wicked all the way to school. And back. And now while I'm writing. And in a few moments when I start doing homework.
The words of this song touch my heart in ways I can't explain. It's like whoever wrote the song knew that at this point in history, in my life, I would need these lyrics to keep me going. They feel like my anthem. "I'm through accepting limits because someone says they're so."
So, as sad and overwhelmed as I feel right now, onward and upward we go. I'm going to keep trying to defy gravity and get through this school work even if it keeps trying to proverbially kill me.
Peace.
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